Archive for March, 2010

American Haiku for Kathleen Hanna

March 20, 2010

If everybody loved each other

In the same way that you love women

This would be a Utopia.


Life of a Sim

March 20, 2010

When there’s seemingly nothing left to be done
And I’ve forgotten those novels on my shelf: I Capture the Castle and Kafka’s Amerika
I turn on my PC and use “The Sims 2”
There a 3-D world of diverse Sims awaits me
I delete all of my useless characters until I reach the extraterrestrial Smiths

Whose patriarch has a ridiculous name and he hates the General next door

After two hours, Mr. Smith is divorced with a son in college

And a drifter named Goopy GilsCarbo has drowned in the family pool

While the Grim Reaper arrives for Goopy’s soul the screen freezes
The game is now as immobile as a .bmp file on Microsoft Paint
It leaves me to wonder if I have become a Sim to technology.

Billy Mays

March 20, 2010

You may not have mastered what all pure choirboys aced

But you were the epitome of perfect pitch

They told you to shave and to whisper, but all you changed was your world

I admit that I never have had much use for Oxiclean

Products will come and go like shorn faces and white lines

But you showed me that persistence will outdo those Hollywood squires

And while I mourn, I will speak only good in my booming monotone of you.