Who is Johnny Lurg?

Johnny D. Lurg (powerword: Gabe Marx, also known as Popeye Squirm, Drew Dickless, Rodney “Rod” Munch, Punky Stilemma, Punky Stillema, and Bob Hughes), is one of the best-known and best-loved users on Oh InternetYTMND, SongMeanings, <slash>Something Awful<slash> (nevah you mind, they b&’d him over some fucktarded shit that had absolutely nothing to do with his frawesome prose n’ poetry). A friend to superdreamkilla and pilleater alike–OH YOU MUST LEARN THE WAYS OF THE LURG. He is an ubercool ubermensch.

The early years

Johnny Lurg arrived on the scene of YTMND as a fresh young face, well-equipped with knowledge from Homestar Runner, Legendary Frog, Waterman, Happy Tree Friends, and some of the Weebl & Bob–but not much else. A star force of YTMNDers called the Forgot Poland Army took young Lurgy Johnn under the wing and taught him the ways of KHAAAAAAAAN, NOOOOOOOOOOO, stapler, and the 3500 hertz square wave (which was intelligently designed by Professor PsychoCola, a friend b/w rival of Lurgy from grade school. Ahh, times were good for the Forgot Poland Army, but a test of Lurgman’s loyalty came when the now-deleted Incubus introduced Lurg to… you know what? I didn’t have to be here, you know. I chose to be here. I didn’t realize it at the time, but who gives a fuck, I’m proud of what I’ve done and you should be too. Because Lurg gave birth (without the copulation n’ conception, though he did experience some hotheaded poonani in the form of a lusty nubile buxom European princess who delivered the Immaculate Night in a matter of minutes) to sum rockin’ to the macks fads, and hurr dey arrgh:

  • Mr. Krabs: I don’t mean to brag, but even though this is truly a pilleater creation, it will always be remembered as the magnum opus of Massa Lurg. pilleater put in all this work into forcing fads, and this oft Jewfro’d not-at-all-autistic omnigenius we call Johnny Lurg took all the credit! He had it coming though, did you see the fool’s comix? One Life Crew? Huttah! Lurg recreated theez oddbawl comix onhttp://xmylifesucksx.blogspot.com/

Fuck it, I’ll get back to this later. ‘Tis a work-in-progress, bitches!





Oh fuck, I forgot to mention superdreamkilla. Well, he’s a really cool script kiddie who should be let into the GNAA. He wrote this article, not Johnny Lurg, I swears it! You won’t believe me, but oh well. Your loss.


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